dear chloe: welcome to the world

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10/20/16

Dear Chloe-

You’re here, baby girl! Actually, you’ve been here for two weeks but i’m just now finding the time to put my thoughts to paper. To be frank, i don’t really understand how our commitment to having you combined with my 39 weeks of pregnancy flew by in what seems like the blink of an eye. But let’s be honest, there were times during this totally brutal summer where time seemed to stand still.

My pregnancy with you was completely boring and uneventful, just the way we like it. This time around i had your sister, who requires a lot of attention, to distract from all the nesting, worrying and planning that takes places with a first pregnancy. But that’s just fine. Your dad and i really worried about what having a second child would do to your sister. You see, she’s a really sensitive child (you’ll come to learn and probably love that about her) for whom we constantly think about what’s best. All those fears were immediately drowned upon your first meeting. Chloe, Hazel is completely obsessed with you. But more on that later.

Equally as boring as my pregnancy was your delivery. Because of my wedding shooting season (i still have two more weddings to finish out the year) your dad and i decided it would be best to go ahead and schedule an induction on your 39th week. This had me incredibly stressed out only because i’ve heard such horror stories about the length and pain of labor brought on by pitocin. However you were eager enough to meet us that, like with your sister, all it took was breaking my water to get the show, quickly, on the road.

8.5 hours after the time i got into our L&D room, you came out screaming at the top of your lungs. In fact, you screamed until they finally brought you a bottle. And you haven’t stopped eating since. That’s my girl.

I had a little bit of a hard time bonding with you during my pregnancy. I’m not sure why. Maybe just the fact that we had/have SO much going on between your dad opening Brew, building a house, my wedding season and your aforementioned big sister all pulling at my attention in polarizing directions. But Chloe, the second they placed you on my chest and you grabbed onto my hand, it was instant.

I completely forgot how bonding it is with your spouse when having a baby. Having your dad tell me how proud of me he was is something i will treasure forever. In that moment it’s such a powerful thing between a mom and dad. I sure do love your dad and moments like that only magnify why i’m so endlessly thrilled that we found each other.

You were born at 7 lbs 4 oz (almost 2 lbs bigger than your sister!) and 21” long. Everyone is having a hard time understanding how your sister was so much smaller bc you seem so teeny tiny! You continue to be the sweetest little girl. You’re having MUCH more awake time than your sister ever did at this age and while she would have most likely been screaming her head off, you simply look around and just take it all in. maybe it’s a fluke and the screaming is still to come or maybe it’s just you. Having so much awake time definitely doesn’t surprise me because while pregnant with you i always joked that i felt you never ever slept because all you did was flip around, kick and punch. All.the.time.

As for me? I’m doing so much better at this point that i was with hazel. Part of that is because i decided not to breastfeed you. That may sound silly to some but for lots of reasons, it just didn’t work for me. I felt guilty about that decision for a while but your pediatrician said it so perfectly: it doesn’t matter what you feed baby if mom isn’t happy. Happy mom should always be number one. My recovery has also been 100 times easier. But let’s be honest. I didn’t really have a choice! We have too much going on to have it any other way.

This season of our life is a crazy one, Chloe, and we’re so excited that you’re here to join and complete our little family of p-nuts.

We love you, coco-nut,
momma

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all above professional photos by the wonderful lacey reimann.

below, for some lesser quality but equally meaningful iphone photos:

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